Hellos and Goodbyes

And other Thoughts on the Paradoxes of Life

Hellos and goodbyes are a constant presence during our time together–always bittersweet. Holding space for joy, tenderness, anxiety, sadness and a whole host of emotions begins with embraces by the entryway, and sometimes, lingering on the rides to the airport. Staring at the passing scenery mirrors our shared moments now turned into memories. Whether it’s the 1st or the 20th time, there will always be a tinge in my heart— felt but not spoken.

Yesterday, I was scrolling through my phone and found another moment of goodbye taken five years earlier inside Marina’s freshman dorm room. Malyn and I were catching the train back to Manhattan.

Malyn and Marina embrace each other. Photograph by Stella Kalaw

This particular picture caught my attention. I had framed it to include myself— a rare occurrence. Pure coincidence that a mirror was situated opposite the door. In photography, a paradoxical relationship unfolds—a physical absence of the photographer in the pictures, yet an undeniable presence behind the camera. This image reminds me of it.

What draws me time and time again to photography is its ability to preserve the ephemeral— the fading moment, the passing of time. As we reach our later years, our memories lose their vividness. And that’s where the beauty of photographs lies. They are a doorway for remembering.

Back in Hudson, GT mentioned that this year marks his 20 years of living in Europe. First in Prague, then Budapest, and now in Paris. I took photographs of that warm summer day he left Boston. I had forgotten that Tina and I hitched a ride to the airport with him. I only realized it from scanning these negatives.

(For some of these images, I asked GT to caption them.)

“Eto na nga, Jams. Darating na and reyna.” GT chats with his high school friend Jamie as he prepares to leave for the airport.

GT: I am ending and I am beginning…

GT and Marina watch Blues Clues on TV while waiting to leave for the airport.

GT fills up the labels for his luggage. while Malyn assembles the tags. Ate Marica and Mom look on.

Marina waits in the car while everyone is saying goodbye.

Mom looks on as we drive off to Logan International Airport.

GT: Upwards and onwards: the start of airport farewells.

Dear ones, I hope you enjoyed these photographs. May they invite you to ponder life's paradoxes—the interplay of hellos and goodbyes, absence and presence, forgetting and remembering. Let this be a gentle nudge to remain open to its unfolding.

As always, I’d love for you to share your thoughts. Feel free to leave them in the comments section below. You can also send me a private message at stellakalaw@substack.com.

Happy 4th of July to those who celebrate it this coming week. And if not, I hope you enjoy the rest of your weekend.

See you all next Sunday!